Quarterback calls “HIKE”. Everyone is scrambling on the field. The loud percussion of player’s helmets colliding echoed in my ears. Ball is handed off but all of a sudden I’m on the ground. Someone falls on my hand and I cringe. My hand burns like fire. I get up though-- too much adrenaline. I walk back into the huddle holding by hand like a newborn baby. Teammate asks if something is wrong--I can only say “I don’t know.” I walk to the bench and pull off the black, Nike football glove and throw it on the turf and stare at my contorted thumb. Swollen like it was stung by 10 angry bees. Then I just sit there wondering. Not really wondering about my hand, but wondering about my Mom. I had barely convinced her to let me play football for the season with the help of my Dad. Would this be my last time playing football?
I make the call to my Mom with the nurse’s phone and tell her I got hurt. She didn’t sound mad. That’s good right? Game ends and we end up losing to the cheaters. I thought cheaters never win. Maybe sometimes they have their lucky days. We take the bus back to Potomac and I immediately go to Mr. Cummings to see if he can alleviate the pain. He says it just looks like a “sprain”. Thank God. Turns out it wasn’t a sprain.
Went to my Dad’s friend. He’s an orthopedic. Took a few X-Rays... Sat in his office… Waited for the unexpected news… He said it was broken... “I’m dead.”
Instantly I thought about my Mom and how she’d respond. When my Dad called her and told her the news, she thought he was joking and didn’t believe him until he sent a photo of me and my green colored cast. That’s when she started yelling. “I TOLD YOU HE SHOULDN’T OF DONE FOOTBALL! I KNEW HE WOULD GET HURT!”
Now whenever I mention football, it’s an automatic “NO” from my Mom.
“Can I play fo-”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Remember how you broke your thumb and you couldn’t play tennis or play violin or even write eligible handwriting? Remember that? Now we don’t want that to happen again…”
~ Ethan L.
I really enjoy your vignette! I remember this! You did a great job with your use of words and incorporating your mom in at the end. I'm hoping to hear some more stories from you in the upcoming months. You have a lot of potential. I can be your publisher. We can work together in the Empire State building like Buddy's dad! Great job Tyler! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteThis vignette was very well done! I really like the bolding of certain words and letters. It really gives your piece a sense of character and importance. The dialogue with your mom at the end was also very creative. Good Work! ELR
ReplyDeleteThis Vignette was really well written. I liked how you compared the pain that you had in your wrist to a different pain that people can somewhat relate too. There was a lot of other comparisons throughout the vignette as well. Good Job.
ReplyDeleteMD
I like the intensity of a football game, and the pressure your mom puts on you to not hurt your body. It is well detailed.
ReplyDeleteJH
This vignette is really good. I thought the part where you ask That’s good right? directly addresses the reader making them want to keep reading. -CE
ReplyDeleteI really liked your vignette and how it incorporates a lot of similes
ReplyDelete-K.C.
It is funny how I remember when you came back in the huddle. I just stared. I didn't say a word too.
ReplyDeleteI really like your vignette. I also like how you ended it, I thought it was cool.
ReplyDelete